Psalm 88 Discouragement

Lord You are the God of my transparency, I have cried from the beginning of this trial to the end of this adversity.

Enable my prayer to be heard by You: can You hear the intensiveness's of my pain even though it is sometimes without any sound.

My identity is full of anxiety and stress: my life is plagued with demands and grievances of this world.

My esteem is full of depression and I am without strength; emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

Would You release me from these who choose to be spiritually dead? The pollution of their deprivation ravishes my mental well being. They choose to live against Your Word, worship, and abilities for change.

I have used this depression for the purpose of examining my ignorance and obscure attitudes and behaviors.

Your anger has motivated me to hold myself in account of Your holiness; that is to say, if my will needs to be broken, I trust You Lord to do so.

You removed my knowledge and understanding that I have come to depend on for strength; You revealed that they were idols to me: I was limited and suppressed by them. I can and did not mature.

My thinking is grieved by the rationality of depression. Lord I reveal myself to You; I developed these abilities for Your service.

Would You commit these accomplishments to anyone who is spiritually dead? Can the dead accomplish Your will? Can they praise Your good works? Stop and think about that.

Is Your kind reproof and merciful reproach being led by those who are spiritually dead? Does truth, stability, and faith come to those who have chosen to lose their identity in You?

Can Your accomplishments be recognized or even comprehended in depression or ignorance? Can transparency be pursued within the deprivation of my self confidence?

Only You can answer me: You hear my cry. In the break of day my prayers are decided by You, and You alone.

Lord, do You reject my plea? Why do I feel that You have withheld Your acceptance from Me?

I humble myself before Your will; I will not be afraid to die: I will endure this intimidating anxiety and tormenting confusion.

Your anger overwhelms me; Your reproach feels like rejection.

This type of feelings can flood my thoughts daily if You are not my identity; it corrodes my thinking.

Those whom I love and who love me have left and moved away; my only comfort now is Your understanding of this situation.